Houston, we have a crash landing.
December 17, 2014
My husband travels at least once a month for work. He loves the work that causes him to be away from home, but it is hard on the rest of the family (single parents, or those whose partners work away from home all the time, you are my heros). This week, I had the opportunity to go with him and have a mini vacay in Calgary while he was in meetings. And now I understand how hard it is on him!
We arranged for Grandma to come and watch the kids and do all the ferrying around to activities, school, etc. Prepping was quite the task! But, we had it all sorted, so I merrily hopped on the ebus down to Calgary. What a great way to travel if you need to get to Calgary or Red Deer! $35, free wifi on board, and the bus was quiet and comfortable, so I was able to work. Bliss. Work, uninterrupted by kids, laundry, dishes, etc. I have never been so productive as the hours I had to work while I was in Calgary.
I arrived in Calgary with enough time to relax and primp and prime myself, again, uninterrupted, for the Christmas party we had that night. It was a great dinner, with great company, and at the end of the night, the only people we had to worry about were ourselves. No dog to walk, no lunches to make, no dishes to do. So nice! The next day, my hubby got up early and headed off to his meeting. I, on the other hand, had a day to myself! I slept in, had a leisurely breakfast, a second cup of coffee, and just moved at my own pace. No rushing out the door to school, last minute panics because something was forgotten. All was calm, all was bright. I worked for a bit more, and then met my parents for a few hours, as they live close to Calgary. We had coffee, did some shopping, went for lunch. Again, on our schedule. 3:30 rolled around, and it was time to hop in the car to get back to the kids, home and to relieve Grandma. We were both looking forward to seeing the kids and seeing how everyone faired. Really well – yeah Super Grandma!! We hugged and kissed the monkeys, caught up, and then it was time for everyone to head to bed.
Insert crash landing here. This morning was one giant crash landing. I really enjoyed the novelty of setting my own schedule, my own rhythm, my own routine. And while it was only for about 30 hours, coming back to reality is tough! The kids were both in tears over ridiculous things, I was impatient and frustrated and probably not nearly sympathetic enough. You would think that after a break, I would be more patient, more calm and more sympathetic. Nope, apparently 30 hours of me time is just enough to want more.
And this is where I am now much more sympathetic to my hubby. He sometimes goes away for 4 or 5 days at a time. 4 or 5 days of his own schedule, meals prepped and cleaned up by someone else, adult, brain intensive conversations, evenings of socialising with collegues who are also friends. Then, when he comes home, I practically throw the kids, dog, house and everything else at him because I’m done in. We are going have to figure out a way that allows everyone to acclimatize back. Some time for hubby to decompress and slowly get back into family life, and a way for me and the kids to slowly bring him back into the fold. We will have to work together to set up a system that works for everyone, because this crash landing just causes a major burn.